http://web14.compaq.com/falco/detail.asp?FAQnum=FAQ2859

Compaq FAQ: Where do I find the “Any” key on my keyboard? (FAQ2859)
The term “any key” does not refer to a particular key on the keyboard. It simply means to strike any one of the keys on your keyboard or handheld screen.

Created: 10/8/2001 2:13:42 AM
Modified: 10/25/2002 11:07:05 AM
Author: Mevans

1. Add the required amount of shampoo to the toilet water, and put both
lids up.

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the
bathroom.

3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids.
(You may need to stand on the lid. ) The cat will self agitate and make
ample suds. (Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat
is actually enjoying this.)

4. Flush the toilet three or four times. (This provides a “power-wash” and
“rinse”.)

5. Have someone open the door to the outside (Be sure that there are no
people between the toilet and the outside door.)

6. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.

7. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, and run outside where he will dry
himself off. Both the commode and the cat will now be sparkling clean!

Sincerely,
The Dog

Some time ago, an English Lady was looking for rooms in a little
village called Lortz in Germany. The local schoolmaster took her to
see several delightful homes, and she eventually decided on one. On
her way home however, it occurred to her that she had not noticed a
W.C. She immediately wrote and asked if there was one near the house.
The schoolmaster on receiving the letter, was much troubled, for his
English, being limited, he did not understand the abbreviation W.C.
Finally, he asked the Parish Priest to help him, and together they
tried to think what the Lady must mean by W.C. At last they came to
the conclusion that the Lady meant Wesleyan Church. So the schoolmaster
replied –

Your Ladyship,

I have much pleasure in informing you that the W.C. is situated about
nine miles from the house in the centre of a grove of beautiful
scenery. It is capable of holding 250 people. It opens on Tuesday,
Thursday and Sunday of each week and as there are so many visitors in
the summer months, I would advise you to go early, although there is
plenty of standing room. This is an unfortunate position for you if
you are in the habit of going regularly, but no doubt you will be glad
to know that quite a number take their lunch and make a day of it,
while others who cannot spare the time, travel by car and arrive just
in time. I should especially recommend your Ladyship to pay a visit on
Tuesday as there is an organ accompaniment. The acoustics are excellent
and even the most delicate sounds are audible.

It may interest you to know that my daughter was married in our W.C.
and it was there that she first met her husband. I remember the barrage
quite well on the account of the rush for seats. There were ten on the
seat I usually occupy and it was wonderful to watch the expressions on
their faces. My father has been a regular since the day he was
christened in its waters.

A wealthy resident of the district erected a bell which rings every
time a member enters. A bazaar is to be held soon and the proceeds
will go towards helping to furnish plush seats as every member feels
that it is a long felt want. My wife is rather delicate so she cannot
attend regularly, and it pains her very much not to be able to go more
often. I will be delighted to reserve the very best seat for you if
you advise beforehand, so you will be quite comfortable while you are
there.

Yours Faithfully,
Lortz Schoolmaster.

http://www.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,4057,6947020%5E13762,00.html

Whale flatulence stuns scientists
By Simon Benson
August 14, 2003

IT’S one of the unfortunate consequences of being a mammal – flatulence.

does this mean i have to give it up?

http://www.cnn.com/2003/TECH/internet/08/07/web.addict.ap/index.html